Sticker Love!

Have you noticed those stickers- typically on the back of behemoth SUVs or not so mini “mini” vans- that outline, in stick figure form, all representatives of the family chain? From Toto up to papa. I find this curious. What does this tell me? What do they want it to tell me?

And it’s not often- or, rather, i don’t believe- I see just two stick figures. Man, woman, husband, wife. How odd would that be? Most of the time, you’ve got, as mentioned before, the dog, cat, little Johnny, Sara, Miles, Bambam, and the parents. Sara adorns the stylish, yet simple, triangle skirt, while Miles wears a pair of married rectangles. Bambam, the baby, stands with them- and I think he must be older than a few months because he’s standing- the penultimate lone figure next to Toto. I gaze and think they must be happy.

So I say, is that what they want me, the driver, to think? To think, ‘hey, it’s a family! They’re happy! They’re loving!’ I don’t know. Is it plausible to think someone would stick frowny-faced downers up there? Perhaps not. And, I wonder, what happens when momma births a child with mental retardation? Does she get the same treatment as Sara, and is bedecked in triangle? Or is she purposefully distinguished, as a way of proving her uniqueness, her miracle beauty? Like, for instance, her sticker could include one small eye, and one large to tell me, the audience, that she may be a bit, let’s say, different. Not to be harsh though. And what happens if there’s a dead child. Do they place, on the back of the black GMC, you know, next to the NOT OF THIS WORLD sticker, a tiny, albeit cute RIP marker?

So I pontificate, and say, sure, they want me to believe they’re happy. That’s not a bad thing necessarily. Heck, I want everyone to meet my mom, I want to show off my girlfriend, I’ll want to show off my beautiful baby. But I don’t see stick figure form doing that justice. But what else? Is it a way of saying ‘look, i fit into the societal norm too! I have 2.5 children, one dog and a goldfish gosh dangit!’ I digress, however. In fact, this is just one big digression. Not a rant, per se. Simply just a thought. And, if not here, where else?

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